Update

It's been a while since I've updated this blog. When I got home form Peru I was fired up by all that I had witnessed and enamored with the county. I talked about it everywhere, made mention to it in any conversation regardless of whether it fit the subject or not. I still dream about it, long to return and pray daily for the people I met and those who I didn't. I went back to school and returned to work, life continued on and that burning fire inside of me was put on the back burner. My religion became a routine mundane thing rather than that all encompassing love of Christ flowing out. Nothing exciting happened, my classes were taught, my family moved a mile away, and work was full of laughter but at the end of the day nothing screamed passion.  I longed for that spiritual fuel that flowed through me in Peru, where was the Holy Spirit now that my life had reverted back to its normal state. I recently attended Passion Conference in Atlanta where the focus was Freedom, specifically for the 27 million slaves in the world. here I was overwhelmed by the Spirit telling me to remember the women I met in Peru who were stuck in sex slavery and to forget about myself and become a part of the bigger picture that Christ has for me. I need to live my life boldly taking every action for Christ because I am so blessed to be free; free to live my life anyway I want and to fully embrace my life in Christ.  
I started this blog with the idea that it would be a great tool for those who supported me on my mission trip to stay connected. But as I read back over Mark 9:35 now = "And he sat down and called the twelve. And he said to them "If anyone would be first, he must be last of all and servant of all." two things jump out at me. First is that He called the twelve, as a disciple of Christ I am called to Him. It is a daily acitivity. Second is that I am to be a servant of all.
These 2 things need to directly impact my life regardless of whether I'm on a mission trip, my life is the mission- to live it boldly and fearlessly for the Lord. So that is what this blog will be now, a record of my life as I attempt to live the gospel in my everyday things-work, school, family etc. I know that I will fail but by the grace of God I hope to wake up the next morning and try again.

Peru Day Eight- Cusco

Today was the last orphanage, a boys home for ages 8-15. We played, laughed, fitted with shoes, face painted, sang and generally enjoyed each others company regardless of fatigue and language barriers. 

I feel so blessed that I went on this trip, because I had to put complete trust in knowing that I was in His hands.

Fortunately, that was what the VBS story centered around at the homes we visited, so I felt especially sincere in the message we were sending to the kids. We were there to not only provide the children with the material, but also the emotional support, never letting them forget about God's love for them. This trip was so beautiful, but it's hard to express in words the things I experienced this week; How I couldn't have asked for a more loving, supportive, and genuine group of people found in our Peruvian staff. How the simple act of painting a young girl's nails brought such joy in being attended to. How the tighter squeeze in holding hands or receiving a hug spoke louder than words. How saying goodbye to each child at each home slowly broke apart your heart. How such unimaginable poverty did not crush the spirit of its inhabitants or how some ancient buildings in the Andes could literally steal your breath away. I quickly understood the intense magnitude of God's love for his creation, and how much He wants us to love Him in return.

All of God's creation deserves compassion, and I pray that the children we served will not forget that the love we showed them was not our own but glorified through God. There's beauty in freedom even if one doesn't have it in a physical sense. We are free to love God and to find joy even in the worst of situations, and I will always remember the beauty of so many kids yearning to experience it. I pray in their darkest nights and loneliest hours that they will think of the proof that love is real, that it can be found through Him, that they too can look upon God's giving hands, in a shoe print. I will never forget the children I met, Peruvian staff, or the group of fellow Buckner team members who will all be leaving Peru with their hearts in the hands of 800 kids, their stories forever in our thoughts.

I'd like to close with a quote I heard during the week, "Hope is the unlikely, even the impossible, becoming absolute" (Patsy Clermont). I pray that if the kids I met got anything from our time spent with them besides a new pair of shoes, that it was the hope that comes from living in the hands of God.

Peru Day Seven- Machu Picchu

5:45 is when we left the hotel but it didn't matter to me, here was the day the history buff in me had been waiting for this entire trip Machu Picchu.
It felt like everything that could go wrong did go wrong, people overslept, got sick in the van ride to the train making us almost miss it all together. It was clearly the enemy attacking, but after prayer and faith and patience we made it to the station. I felt like I was at Platform 9 3/4 from Harry Potter, but my train was blue and taking me something just as magical as Hogwarts.

It was a breathtaking ride through the Andes mountains, alongside a rushing river, switch-backing it across mountain sides and drawing nearer and nearer to snow capes and greener vines dangling from mountain sides. The ruins are hidden at the top of the mountain so that all you see is this town sitting at the base of a mountain that rises before you like a scene from Jurassic Park.

We took a bus up a one lane road to the top of the mountain and Machu Picchu was before us, we had to hike up to the highest point but it was completely worth it. I was amazed at God breathtaking beauty and his gift that he gave us in the landscapes around us.

We toured the ruins with an native Incan guide who was passionate about what she was telling us, conveying her emotions in her hand gestures and facial expressions.

I was blessed to see this place, to stand in God's creation, witness the power of man to alter that landscape for our own purposes.

Peru Day Six- Cusco

This morning we flew to Cusco. It is the largest population living at the highest elevation in the world. It is at 12,000 feet above sea level. They warned us all week to be aware of altitude sickness and to hydrate in order to prevent it. I used my inhaler regularly to open my lungs to the fullest capacity but the moment that I stepped off the pressurized cabin of sea level to 12,000 feet, I felt dizzy, light headed and could not catch a deep breathe. In the airport I almost fainted flat out but lucky maid to to the hotel with out embarrassing myself. There a little old peruvian man wheeled out an old oxygen tank and provided me with a clean mask to aid in my breathing.
Cusco was like a dream after the gloomy sky of Lima in winter, here the air was crisp, the sky brilliantly blue with fluffy clouds.

This afternoon we visited the Buen Pastor Home for 55 girls ages 6-17. Winded from walking from the bus to the meeting area, no one was really ready to be enthusiastic with these girls. We were tired, sick and missed our Lima translators so much that I for one was having a hard time bonded with anyone else. What were definitely not ready for the was the vitality that shone in these girls spirit. They opened their welcoming with traditional Incan and Peruvian dances. 

I worked as the memory verse leader for a person who opted not to go on the Cusco portion of the trip. I had so much fun reciting the verse alongside the girls, we were learning together both foreign to this particular verse in memory and language.
Fitting them was a breeze, they loved to play sports the the plainer the shoe the more they like them :) Who new volleyball was so popular in Peru?
We spent more time at this home, since it was the only one we visited it that day and despite our physical health and mental weariness, my connection to the girls was deep.

That night we ate a traditional Peruvian meal and there was a band and performance dancing, it seemed that everywhere we went some one was sing to us or dancing for us. It reminded me of two verses, Psalm 149:3 "Let them praise his name with dancing and make music to him with tambourine and harp." and Psalm 30:11 "You turned my wailing into dancing; You removed my sack cloth and clothed my with Joy.". Here were people living in a world filled with injustice, orphans with out anything and yet they were dancing with God's joy.

Peru Day Four :)

My day today was very exciting because I got to hold babies. First we visited the Reyna de la Paz home, a home where very young mothers and their children live. The girls were teenagers and many were victoms of sexual abuse from family members or random strangers. When we first arrived there, it was like a community, all the girls friends with each other joining together in their pain to bring joy to their new lives. When we greeted the girls our first thought was shock. Here were these girls, who were younger then me (one little girl was 12!) living a completely different life. You could see God working through these mother's hearts however, because despite the situation they were in, they had smiles on their faces and greeted us with open arms. One of the girls told us her story. She got pregnant at 16 years old. After her baby was born, she lived with the father of the baby who was in his thirties. He would beat her and that was when she came to live at the Reyna de la Paz home. Hearing this, I felt so much compassion towards her. I couldn't even imagine what she is going through but I pray that God will show her his amazing love and heal her brokenness. I spent most of my time in the newborn room, helping the two ladies in charge of 6 babies, care and feed for them. In broken english I asked how many children were there, what were the mom's daily routines, etc.

Half through the morning one mom came in to feed here baby, after she was done she sat down to pump some milk for later, being the american that I am I assumed that she would use a breast pump, I didn't expect the newest model but instead she sat there and pump her breast by hand letting it drip in to the bottle. I was shocked! Im normally very comfortable around breast feeding and pumping and typical mom behaviors but seeing this mother who was younger then me sit there and take a painstaking long time to pump a small amount of milk for her child while she was gone broke my heart. I asked the head lady if they had mechanical breast pumps and the answer was no. Immediately I wanted to go buy them one, or two or enough for mother. But was it a custom thing that they didn't have them or money or both? I was so touched by this that I am hoping to buy or collect several pumps to send down to the home for these young mothers. Right now I am praying for understanding if it's a custom difference, clarity if its not to see the next step of action.

The second home was amazing. It was another government run home. The children run up to you the moment they see you and cling to you so tight, it's hard to breathe. It makes you feel special in a way because you are sharing that moment with these orphans who will never forget it. The most important thing to these children is to feel loved and accepted and hopefully we achieved that today through teaching the word of God. We asked them if they knew they were in God's hands and they all replied in unison, "si." We were grateful that the kids knew God has the whole world in his loving hands and they are not forgotten.

It was a blessing to be able to share God with these children and seeing their compassion for him. As we continure to pray for them we hope they continue to grow in theeir relationship with Christ. It was a great experience that I will never forget.

Peru Day Three

I slept horrible last night I couldn't regulate my temperature at all. Never the less this morning we loaded up and went to an orphanage named San Antonio, where we would fit 75 boys and girls with new shoes.
Before the kids arrived in we all danced and just relaxed before the chaos would ensue. The kids here were so loving and immediately hugged us and held our hands.

I sat with three little boys around 4/5 years old, so sweet. We all sang God is so big and danced together before they split in to color groups. One of the little boys was so upset about me want to follow him to the group that he latched on kicking any who tried to take him away. It broke my heart.
Fitting the kids was easy, my spanish is improving and expanding so that I was able to ask if they like them and that god loves them and that these shoes are for them. It was amazing to communicate with them and to join in their excitement to receive shoes like their friend or ones that light up.

We played monkey in the middle, soccer, keep away and simple chase all filled with laughter and pure joy. They simply giggled with you and smiled when you caught them in a hug. That kind of love ad joy is infectious, there is no way to not be affected making goodbyes that much harder when they reach in for a hug, tears and smiles and say "Ciao".
After the last kid was fitted. All returned to the big room and put on an authentic Peruvian dance for us, half way through the dancers grabbed people from the crowds to join in.

New Shoes!!!

A little girl grabbed me and I danced with out thoughts of what anyone thought because in that moment that was my worship to God for blessing the kids and myself.  

The next place was the Cima home for boys it was an hour ride outside Lima literally over the mountain and over a barren river bed. It was nestled in the mountains and bathed in the first sunlight that I had seen since arriving here. The boys are from 8 to 18 years old and are runaways, broken homes, drug addicts or throwaways. It was an open home so everyone there wanted to be there.We crowded into their music room and they played for us on traditional Peruvian flute pipes and sang with drums and guitars.

I stayed behind the lines at the shoes station and didn't fit a single boy but witnessing their joy with their fitters was awesome. I reflected on my brothers and their attitudes and how grateful I am for my mom and how hard she works for us to live how we do. Some of them were asked what bad things in their lives that God has used for good? And one boy mentioned drugs and overcoming them and it reminded me of my cousin and how grateful I am that he is who he is but I also thought about my dad and how did not survive that struggle. 

Everyone returned and we all sang and danced together. The couple of the boys stood up and thanked us for coming. I wept. They are so grateful and loving and accepting.
It was hard to leave. But we left with prayers in our hearts and know that Gods plans for them are just starting.

Peru Day Two- Lima

Morning came way to soon. But it was an immediate start to head out to an all boys orphanage that is government run. It was an hour long drive that started in Lima but quickly regressed to humble shacks and rubble filled poverty clumps that hug the mountains that themselves look like giant sand piles left over from a giant kid making a sandcastle.
I thought Pamplona was one area, huge but singular in it's level of depravity but apparently outside of the city limits property is common.
Huge oil pipes and natural gas factories are nestled in the base of the mountains and the roar of the pacific can be heard over the rumble of the old bus on broken concrete and dirt roads.

The orphanage is encased by a green concrete wall and locked shut. It's right on the beach, closer than any beach front home in the states. Eventually the wooded gate is opened by a uniform guard and we ride in to a deserted courtyard.
We are locked in.

We are led to a dinning room that looks like a school cafeteria. Picnic tables and bare florescent lights complete the look. The kids come in, in four straight lines smiling broadly asking if the boxes are full of zapatoes. About 15 of the kids have mental disabilities.

The boys were so easy to fit because they really didn't care what the shoe looked like but that they were new and clean.





After everyone is fit, I venture out and play a game of futbol with them, let's just say that they are fast competitive little boys but I held my own.


We had a box lunch and were led to this wooded gate with a simple solid door in that when opened is right on to the beach. Imagine these boys are surrounded by cornet but right on the other side is God's glorious creation.

This beach was trashed, rubble everywhere. We sat alongside a stone wall and I looked out onto a ocean that I had never seen before and Gods vastness washed over me.

The next stop was a community center in a rural poverty rich area in Acnon. Here were boys and girls, baby to elementary age. I stepped away from the shoes station to participate in the bible study with the preschool kids. Looking into their faces I was remind of my children back home, all kids are the same they seek the same things. Their God is the same who shines in my preschool class room and He is so big and mighty and strong. I met a little girl named Sophia. She was the first kid to answer my questions in spanish when I asked them. She is 4 yrs old lives with her mom and little brother. I was able to find her pink shoes which is her favorite color.

I held a baby and put stickers all over little kids who laughed with glee as I tickled them. We all sang Jesus loves me and danced. Gods movement is evident he is powerful and provides such hope for these people. I am simple blessed to witness it and humble by gratitude.

Dinner was located in one of the Buckner transitional homes for girls. These girls are in college and once they obtain jobs they will move out. It was like a sorority house. They are proud of their studies and so grateful to be able to attend school that it reminded me to be thankful too.